Cheeky Gaming Ads: Vintage Arcade Flyers

Before the world went nuts and people turned into whiny-ass vanguards of social righteousness, video game advertisements were frequently quite awesome. Welcome to Cheeky Gaming Ads, where we highlight samples of how the video game industry didn’t take itself so seriously and let their advertisements reflect the spirit of their games… through fun.

For this go-around, let’s look at a few arcade game flyers.

Enjoy!


Surfer-Arcade-flyer
Both of these individuals died of a cocaine overdose just minutes later

Cabal-arcade-flyer
You can see the exit wounds. Awesome.

Lil Hustler-arcade-flyer
I trust this kid. Don’t you trust this kid?

Tapper-arcade-flyer
Women + alcohol = What? You thought I was going to make a rape joke!? Shame on you!

ataxx-arcade-flyer
Technically, all of those monsters are naked… but you’re only looking at the one, aren’t you?

video poker-arcade-flyer
Gambling? A woman showing her legs? This is DEFINITELY not Taliban-approved.

Mortal Kombat-arcade-flyer
Where are your parents, you little shits?!

Gotcha-arcade-flyer
“Gotcha, bitch!” Lighthearted play between consenting adults, or #MeToo moment? Only CNN can say for sure.

Super Tank-arcade-flyer
That tank must have quite a girthy barrel

Mad Alien-Deco-data east-arcade-flyer
Check out this hot chick holding an uzi! Not pictured: a mad alien

Barrel pong-arcade-flyer
Women + alcohol = no, I still won’t make a rape joke, you garbage perthon!

Jungle King-arcade-flyer
All those fake ferns really sell it… That and the beige wall in the back… That and the sexy, savage redhead…

Shark Attack-arcade-flyer
Part 1 of 2. Wait for it…

Shark Attack-arcade-flyer-GPI
Thrust and munch!* (* From the “69” sex position instruction manual) Also, “Bite my bait” bikini bottom? Yes, ma’am.

Strike Zone-dallas cowboys cheerleader-arcade-flyer
A Dallas Cowboys cheerleader advertising a baseball game? #Triggered

Sea Devil-arcade-flyer
Wow, that’s an awfully elaborate and colorful background… Kinda distracts from the topless blonde mermaid. Oh, there’s a submarine game in there, too.

Hard Yardage-Strata-NFL-arcade-flyer
Oh no! Football AND attractive cheerleaders!? That’s TWO things that men enjoy! They must be stopped!

Thanks for reading!

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